Tuesday, April 10, 2007

You know you're in Florida when...

  1. You see an alligator behind the house within an hour of your arrival.
  2. Your hosts talk about hitting the early bird special for lobster night at one of the local restaurants.
  3. You've seen three alligators behind the house within three days after your arrival, and are told that you might see more, because it's mating season.
  4. Your Little One begins to say words in Spanish before he feels comfortable in English.
  5. Your host strongly recommends not going past the last house at the end of the street, as just beyond the grass is the beginning of the lake, and alligators like to hang out there. To bring the point home, your host mentions how she once took a walk down to the end of the street, walked in the grass, looked down at the lake, and saw an alligator staring back at her.
  6. The obituaries column in the local newspaper shows that no one is actually originally from here.
  7. If you see an alligator by the local bank machine (in close proximity to a lake, lest you think they can be found wandering the city streets), you can call someone to come and take him away.
  8. Taking a walk through the neighborhood involves looking both ways at golf cart crossings.
  9. You learn how to say "alligator" in Spanish.
  10. You feel like the youngest person wherever you go. By a lot. Especially when you find yourself having lunch in a restaurant before noon.
  11. Streets downtown display signs with arrows, indicating evacuation routes in the event of a hurricane.

Three shirts have been added to the Official Clothing Count.


lisoosh said...

Bwaaahaha. Thought the last sentence was going to be signs showing alligator crossings!

That would freak me out.

Stefanella said...

OMG!! I'm F**ng dying over here! Alligators in the backyard, at the ATM machine...mwahahaha indeed. It's like planet of the apes but with alligators

Emah S said...

OMG my little guy's doctor today was asking me if it's true what THEY say about the alligators in Florida. Maybe he reads your blog???

hee hee

Got a kick out of the Early Bird comments, miss those! Tell the truth, how many bagel places have you been to for lunch? Or even better, how many times have you been to the "favorite" bagel place???

ahhhh.....Florida, do I miss it??? NOPE!

Liza said...

Emah S: No bagel places yet - we've been suffering through Passover!

nrg said...

can you have bagels now???

You said they didn't do early bird specials, missy?? Or is there an exception for Lobster!!?? :-)

Hola, hijo de Liza! Como estas? Donde esta los caimanos??

Has he learned that Dora doesn't really speak Hebrew? ;-)

No accents here... too hard to find on the keyboard...

RR said...

Wow, I didn't realize the alligators were so up close and personal! You be careful now, 'hear?

rami said...

Really funny post! What's allegator in spanish?

the dame said...

I was born in Florida and have lived there twice - adding up to about a dozen years. The scary thing is - you aren't exaggerating. At least, depending on where in Florida one is. I remember watching alligators in the back yard (and making bets with my father about how long my mother's pomeranian was going to last in their new neighborhood.) When I moved away the last time, I moved to a college town. I felt as if I had aged a decade just by relocating.

So adorable in the previous post about the little one talking louder in order to be understood while speaking Hebrew. So cute.

I hope you have a good visit!

tafka PP said...

Ok, definitely never going to Florida. Ew alligators!

Finnspadre said...

Sounds like shoes and a matching bag on the hoof to me... Get in there and wrassle, Liza!!

Mel Balsamo said...

Hey I'm from Miami. I would say that alligator thing is not that accurate. But they truly are everywhere. You get used to it after a few weeks. Everything else on that list is right on the money! My family owns a golf cart but only my dad who plays..

Mel Balsamo

Life Out East said...

My entire knowledge of Florida doesn't exceed what I saw on Miami Vice in the eighties.
That alligator thing really doesn't sound good.

Benji Lovitt said...

Nothing about terrible rain and humidity?

jessica said...

Yikes! Bon Voyage!!